Crompton Divided by Robert Sheckley

 




Let me begin with a confession. I debated with myself as to whether or not I should post a review of this Sheckley novel. At first I decided no review since I just did post a review on the author's Immortality Inc. and alluded to all the Loney Tunes craziness. With Crompton Divided, I'd have to do repeat myself.

But on further reflection, I decided I'd review Crompton Divided, a novel where Sheckley focuses on facets of human personality and the practice of psychotherapy that provide the author a canvas to share his wild, unbounded imagination and counts as one of the most outrageous sidesplitters ever written.

Most certainly Crompton Divided is a howler, a combination commentary on psychoanalysis, Alice in her Wonderland and MAD Magazine featuring Alfred E. Neuman gone bonkers.

The story's setup stated succinctly: Alistair Crompton (surely a takeoff on occultist Aleister Crowley) goes haywire as a teenager where there's only one cure in this far future world: perform brain surgery to split off the sensual part of his personality and also the violent part of his personality and send these two parts to live their own lives on planets within distant galaxies. Sound ridiculous? Sheckley uses the softest of the soft SF as his framework to launch a madcap tale where Crompton journeys forth as a less than complete adult on his cosmic odyssey to seek reintegration of his parts and thereby become whole once again (a risky procedure but Alistair feels he has no other choice).

Since much of the humor derives from Sheckley's jocular but sophisticated use of language and terminology, I'll link my comments to a few juicy quotes from the book.

“Asians have no fixed “self” to refer to. Aaians are only who they happen to have chosen to be for a period of time. When the moment comes to be someone or something else, they shed their former bodies, feelings, values, etc., and existences....Before doing any business with an Aaisan, ask him for the date of expiration on his current psychosomatic setup. He is bound to honor his commitments during this term by the oldest ethical rule of the race: Say what you do and do what you say in the words of Amirra Tauba, founder of the Aaian Uniform Code of Ethics for Consciously Sentient Beings."

The above is an excerpt from the brochure Crompton reads on the spaceship headed for planet Aaia, his first destination, home of Edgar Loomis, the sensual pleasure component of his scattered personality. Sheckley doesn't miss a chance to hit on one of his abiding SF themes: given the proper set of circumstances, individuals (of any species) can change bodies as easily as they change clothes. Also, note a spinoff of Say what you mean and mean what you say. Sheckley brings playing with words to the pitch of comic virtuoso art – you'll continually encounter, to list several: spoonerisms, phonic reversals, neologisms, onomatopoeia, paraprosdokians and malapropisms.

First step for Crompton: seeing Edgar Loomis in person so he knows what he's dealing with. After all, asking Loomis to give up his separate body in order to reintegrate with him could prove a bit tricky. Crompton goes to a theater to watch Loomis perform on stage. What a show! Here's the grand finale:

"A large stage had appeared. Crowded on it were all of the humanoforms who had performed in that night's episodes. Behind them were two symphony orchestras. As Crompton watched, all of these beings threw off their clothing and crowded together, closer, closer, writhing and slipping and sliding over, around, under and into each other in an unlikely potpourri of arms, thoraxes, feelers, wings, cunts, chitins, claws, tentacles, cocks, shoulders, heads, ovipositors, exoskeletons, pistils, kneecaps, mandibles, fins, stamens, suckers, and the like. Somehow, despite their contorted and unnatural positions, the humanoforms were able to sing, squeak, whistle and vibrate."

We can imagine Alistair Crompton's reaction to this sensual feast. After all, he's a man whose most exciting activity in his adult life has been playing solitaire. Alistair must ask himself: does he really want Loomis the unabashed sensualist taking up residence in his very own mind? Sidebar: I include the quote to underscore Sheckley is all about the extreme limits of exaggeration.

Alistair pushes on. He travels to yet again another planet to find Dan Stack, the violent part of his personality. What a hoot! Perhaps no surprise, Alistair discovers Dan Stack qualifies as a homicidal maniac, a ruthless killer who would feel at home in Cormac McCarthy's Blood Meridian. At one point a foreman at Blood Delta relates to Alistair how Dan Stack started killing his own men. “Stack just like using that whip too much.” Once again, Alistair Crompton the sedate player of solitaire has to make a choice: Is reintegration worth a trek across swamps and through hostile lands to seek out a cold blooded killer?

The Intersentient Therapeutics Center on the planet of Aion could prove the final destination. Alistair wonders if he should undergo treatment. One psychiatrist tells him, "We here at Aion believe that all sentient creatures are endowed with Original Sanity, and that we are the unremitting instrumentalities in the bringing forth of that Sanity. We have never failed, except of course at those times when our anticipations have been frustrated by premature terminations of the patient's life processes. Can't win them all, I guess."

Will Alistair Crompton accomplish what he set out to achieve? Recall he was told directly dangers are involved in reintegration. If you want to find out just how bugged out Loony Tunes loony Robert Sheckley can be, you've found your novel.


American SF author Robert Sheckley, 1928-2005

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