Meet Allmen: the perfect Swiss gentleman and cultured aesthete. There's just one thing he requires to maintain his exquisite, highly refined lifestyle—money. Without a large quantity of that most valuable commodity, what will his life be reduced to? Not to worry. Allmen will take the necessary steps to make quite sure such an abominable quagmire is avoided. Legally? Please, one needn't trifle over such minor matters.
Allmen's father, a farmer turned wealthy landowner, died suddenly at age sixty-two. He left his only son enough money to ensure that—with prudence and economy—he would never have to work for a living. But those were two qualities Allmen sorely lacked. He was not a numbers person; his field was languages. After years studying in the world’s capital cities, Allmen spoke fluent, accent-free English, French, Italian, Spanish, and Portuguese. He could also converse in Russian, Swedish, and "broadcaster's German," though he quickly recognized he made a better impression speaking German with his natural Swiss accent.
Allmen, the cultivated cosmopolitan, has turned culture itself into a way of life. He converted a greenhouse into a substantial library where he spends most of his day. In the opening pages, Allmen is reading a thriller by Elmore Leonard—a hobby he loves, having found reading an effective way to live at a remove from one's immediate surroundings. He also plays classical music on his baby grand piano, which sits in that same greenhouse. Today, he lives on the grounds of a grand estate on the outskirts of Zurich, having sold the villa itself to pay off the debts incurred to maintain his lifestyle as a gentleman of independent means.
While vacationing in Guatemala, Allmen met Carlos, a gardener who asked to return to Switzerland with him. Allmen agreed, and Carlos became not only his gardener, cook, and housekeeper, but much, much more. The fiercely loyal Carlos took on the role of Allmen’s indispensable assistant and confidant—especially when it came time to engage in creative maneuvers to pay off Allmen’s ever-increasing debts. Reading about Allmen and Carlos acting as a team becomes one of the supreme pleasures of all the novels in Martin Suter’s Allmen series.
On the opening pages of the novel, crisis looms. In past years when he was wealthy, Allmen was most generous with extending credit. Now that he is on the other side of these financial transactions as a debtor, he expects a similar patience from his creditors. Instead, he receives a notice from a particular collector who is decidedly not behaving like a gentleman.
In a word, Allmen needs money—fast. As it turns out, he stumbles upon a splendid opportunity following a night at the opera with an alluring young lady who insists he call her Jojo. "Never in his life—and his life had been eventful in this regard—had a woman thrown herself on him with such insatiable hunger as this platinum-blonde opera acquaintance."
Later at Jojo's mansion (actually her father's residence), while Jojo is snoring away after satisfying her sexual hunger, Allmen slips out of bed. In an adjoining bedroom turned gallery, he discovers a collection of Art Nouveau glassware by the legendary Émile Gallé. Among the collection sit five dragonfly bowls. If Allmen were to take just one of these bowls as "payment for services rendered," he would be in a most favorable position to deal with that nasty creditor.
What follows is a fast-paced adventure with all the aesthetic trimmings—a delightful novella that can be read in a single afternoon. For those who prefer listening, there is also an excellent audiobook narrated by the legendary Grover Gardner. Highly recommended for the literary connoisseur.
Swiss author Martin Suter, born 1948
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